Pesky Ghosts

"What's that noise in there? Are you having a load of massive shits? I can hear a load of splashing"

"What, erm no, no, some fucking ghosts are throwing rocks at me"


"Yeah I know, sounds weird doesn't it? Tell you what, these ghosts STINK too"

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Who else remembers their ‘best ever Christmas’?

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. Jack Frost nipping at your toes. Your fiancee's body rotting in the gara.. hang on a minute.

That was your 'best ever'? What was the worst? Oh yeah, you've seen that god awful BBC advert haven't you? Fair enough then.

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All new Jazz Club

Exclusive (for now)



Alongside this Fosters are be running another Twitter comp from 2pm Thursday until midnight Sunday. This week you can win a signed Jazz Club sign. The winner will be announced on the Monday morning. They’ll tweet a question from @fostersfunny  about the Jazz Club episode and ask for people to tweet them their response using #JazzClub. So you could win!!! Nice, etc.

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You know this isn’t normal, right?


Walking round like "The Lactator*" whenever you go near your dolls? You know you should probably get rid of the dolls, and perhaps spend more time with real people, yes? If I got a painful, spitting erection every time I walked past a mannequin in my house I'd consider getting out a little more, perhaps meeting some real people, that sort of thing.

Of course that doesn't happen to me. My mannequin and I have long moved to a different kind of relationship; she barely speaks to me any more, and I've a feeling she's seeing someone else. Pretty sure my Henry Hoover has started winking at me though, so…


*Female milk-firing Terminator. I dunno, I was tired when I wrote this.

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The Fast Show is back!

Along with Fosters. Ace.

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